I like DC characters; I just hate DC

I'm Amy, a white queer atheist vegetarian cis female physics major. I spend most of my time fangirling Connor Hawke, Jason Todd and Cassandra Cain. This blog is sex-positive, body positive, QUILTBAG positive, anti-racism, anti-misogyny, anti-ableism, anti-oppression in general, anti-whatever fuckery DC is pulling now, and pro-Missing-E. Check out http://daggerpen.livejournal.com/tag/fanfiction for my fics. I have SPD and a migraine disorder, so please tag for flashing lights, general trigger warnings, and, just as a personal "I'm tired of seeing scans from these shitty arcs" thing, tag for Fabian Nicieza and Grant Morrison, as well as the issue numbers of the arcs in which they both butchered Jason's characterization.
I am likewise willing to tag for anything. I do my best to tag for anything that might generally be a problem for someone, but if I'm posting something you need to Savior, just drop me an ask and I'll do my best. Thanks to Tumblr user dimethyloctopus for the icon. Check out the full version here: http://dimethyloctopus.tumblr.com/post/48569979761/cass-cain-redesign-kinda
Posts tagged "parenting"

disabilityhistory:

The joy of parenting goes deep, but when you have a disability you have a lot more to think about so you can be the best parent possible.

While a lot of adapted products for parents with disabilities are made by occupational therapists, there are several you can purchase at big box stores. If you’re a parent with a disability who wants to make sure they have all the best products at their disposal, check out the list below.

These are probably expensive, but they may give you ideas for cheaper devices that you can rig up yourself (or with help). 

thedarkchocolatedandy:

Your desire to protect your children doesn’t override their necessity to be themselves. 

Stop trying to force your children into heteronormative boxes and using your motherhood as an excuse. 

The only thing your doing by telling your children “stop being so flamboyant, don’t dress so gay, why can’t you be more masculine” is telling them that society is justified in their treatment of your children. 

It is not your child’s responsibility to surrender their being for the sake of someone else’s comfort. Especially not the comfort of a stranger. 

You’re not making your children safer by demanding they sacrifice who they are for your peace of mind. 

Your kid has the right to be as weird or non-weird as they want to be, given that they’re not hurting anyone in the process. Stop trying to convince them otherwise. 

I understand your heart is in the right place but all your doing is making things worth. 

If you want your child to be safe, then help foster a society that respects their right to exist, stop trying to force them to acclimate to one that doesn’t. 

I began to perceive a new construct of trans women start popping up all over the place in media and culture, like dandelions in the Spring. One minute it was wholly absent from the public consciousness, the next minute (sometime in mid-2011) it was fucking everywhere. This was The Child Who Simply Knew. The little child who was born a boy but right from the get go insisted she was a girl and wanted to play with dolls and wear pretty dresses and go to Girl Scouts. And everywhere across North America you could hear the collective, patronizing “awwwww” of the cis-patriarchal consciousness.

bebinn:

This post will continue to be updated, so if you don’t see anything of use to you, check back to the source or under my Important Posts page. Any resources of these kind that I’ve missed, please reblog with them or message me. This goes for any category you believe you should add, with both financial and social support systems.

Decision-making:
  • If you’re not ready or able to talk to anyone, Pregnancy Options has a free, printable workbook to help you make a decision
  • Backline offers a full range of reproductive counseling and referrals, and the National Abortion Federation provides information on pregnancy and abortion, and support and referrals for abortion services.
  • The Religious Coalition for Reproductive Choice offers counseling for decision-making, concerns involving abortion, and referrals
  • The Abortion Assistance Blog has lists of clinics, abortion funds and people offering rides to/from the clinic, lodging for people traveling a long distance, babysitting, moral support, and referrals
  • The Administration for Children & Families has information on adoption
  • Here’s a list of adoption lawyers, which you can refine by state
  • State Adoption Program Managers
  • Knowing how far along you are is important in knowing how much time you have to decide. Ask your local free/low-cost clinic if they perform ultrasounds, or if they can give recommendations. Your nearest Planned Parenthood may offer free or low-cost ultrasounds depending on your income, or provide referrals.
  • See if there is a nearby community college or other training site for people studying ultrasound and imaging technology. Sometimes you can get an ultrasound performed for free by students!
Giving Birth (also see Health Care):
  • See if a doula and/or midwife program in your city or state offers low-cost or volunteer labor and birth support. Here’s a list of volunteer doula programs to start. It’s also possible to negotiate a lower fee with doulas and midwives.
  • Operation Special Delivery provides volunteer doula services to those whose military partners have been injured or killed, and those who are or will be deployed or otherwise unable to attend the birth.
  • Medicaid may help cover the cost of a birthing center, which provides a safe and comfortable alternative to hospital or home birth. Some birthing centers also offer payment plans.
  • There are lots of online checklists for what to bring to the hospital during your labor and birth
  • 32 Ways to Save Money During Your Hospital Birth
  • You can negotiate with the hospital - what they charge you is WAY more than what it costs them. If you’re paying in cash, they may give you a discount. There are a lot of tips and forums dealing with hospital negotiations online. Here’s one website.

Health Care:

  • Look over your insurance options at Healthcare.gov
  • Your state’s Medicaid program
  • The Affordable Care Act expands insurance and health care options for pregnant people and children, including the Children’s Health Insurance Program (CHIP). You can find local health care centers, services, and information on their page.
  • Many Planned Parenthood locations provide general health care at little to no cost, depending on your income
  • Nurse-Family Partnership offers free at-home (or another safe place) pregnancy and childcare assistance until your child turns two.
  • NeedyMeds is a directory of programs that offer assistance to people who can’t afford their medications or health care.
  • Free Dental Care can help you find low-cost or free clinics
  • Look for dental and dental hygiene schools if you are comfortable with closely-supervised students
  • Your state’s United Way program may sponsor or help you connect with low-cost or free dental care
Food:
Housing:
Parenting:
  • Backline can connect you to parenting resources
  • Your state’s Department of Human Services may have a program to provide low-income, working parents with access to quality, affordable child care
  • The US Department of Health and Human Services sponsors the Child Care and Development Fund (CCDF) to both states and Native tribes
  • eHow has a step-by-step guide to finding child care assistance through Child Care Aware
  • You may be able to find parenting and home ec. classes, baby materials, social support, child care, and other resources through your place of worship
  • Many diaper and formula companies offer free samples and opportunities to win packages or cash
Disabilities (also see Health Care):
  • Search for your state’s Early Childhood Intervention (ECI or EI) services. These services are mandated by Part C of the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act.
  • If you or your partner are disabled, your child can receive Social Security benefits
  • Family Village is a directory of resources on disability rights, social support, information, and merchandise
  • Parent to Parent USA is a national organization that matches families with trained volunteer support parents who can connect them to local resources, provide information on health care, and teach coping skills
  • The Arc provides services, information, self-advocacy and employment opportunities, and referrals through their local chapters to people with intellectual and developmental disabilities
Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault:
  • RAINN has both phone and online counseling hotlines to connect you to local rape crisis centers. Centers offer support, counseling, and other resources.
  • The National Domestic Violence Hotline provides similar services, as well as safety planning if you are not able or ready to leave
  • Helpline has articles and resources on domestic violence
  • What to do if your partner refuses to wear a condom
  • Find homeless shelters, family shelters, residential treatment centers, transitional housing, and other women’s shelters via Women’s Shelters
  • I’ve thought about leaving - how can I do it?
  • Your local Planned Parenthood or reproductive health clinic can offer counseling, discreet birth control, and other resources for victims of sexual assault and domestic violence
  • Some crisis pregnancy centers/pregnancy resource centers can also provide, or refer you to places that provide help with rent, prenatal and infant care, and basic baby items. Always use caution when contacting CPCs - many exist to dissuade you from abortion, and some may try to convert you, require you to be Christian or take Bible classes to receive help, or practice coercive adoption. Use them as a last resort or get a recommendation from someone who has used their services.
Please reblog so others have these sources. 

(via stfuconservatives)

andythenerd:

First off, I reject one-size-fits-all parenting, so you could really re-write this list to be 20 things you personally feel your child should hear. But for my update of the attached list (on things a mother should tell a son):

1. You will set the tone for the sexual relationship, so don’t take something away from her that you can’t give back.

So don’t be a douchebag. Wait for enthusiastic consent before acting, and let your partner know that ze never “owes” you anything, ever.

2. Play a sport.  It will teach you how to win honorably, lose gracefully, respect authority, work with others, manage your time and stay out of trouble.   And maybe even throw or catch. 

If you feel like it. You can also try out for academic competitions and art fairs, which will teach you similar values. Or get lost in a good book. Or volunteer for a charity. Find what makes you feel like “you”.

3. Use careful aim when you pee.  Somebody’s got to clean that up, you know.

And remember when you clean up a mess you’ve made, you have made the day just that much better for the next person.

4. Save money when you’re young because you’re going to need it some day.   

But also remember that money has no power unless it’s in motion, and there’s no shame in living paycheck-to-paycheck.

5. Allow me to introduce you to the dishwasher, oven, washing machine, iron, vacuum, mop and broom.  Now please go use them.

And if you like, we can spend time doing the chores together, turning work into play. As long as you do your share, I’ll do mine, and we can sing a song together.

6. Pray and be a spiritual leader.

Or don’t. This one is really up to you. No pressure.

7. Don’t ever be a bully and don’t ever start a fight, but if some idiot clocks you, please defend yourself.

It’s okay to run away. No really, it is. Life isn’t fair, and sometimes people who are acting in self-defense are punished anyway. You use your best judgement.

8. Your knowledge and education is something that nobody can take away from you.

Unless they punch you in the right place (see above). :D But seriously, your thoughts and experiences are your own.

9. Treat women kindly.  Forever is a long time to live alone and it’s even longer to live with somebody who hates your guts.

More importantly, there is no default human. No seriously, it’s not the hetero white cis male, and it’s certainly not you.

10. Take pride in your appearance. 

However you define that. Sometimes people will try to force you to look how they expect you to look. Whether you comply is up to you. But I’ll gladly look past any exterior to see the you inside.

11. Be strong and tender at the same time. 

And more importantly, remember that being masculine doesn’t make you more of a man, and being feminine doesn’t make you more of a woman. Or anything in-between.

12. A woman can do everything that you can do.  This includes her having a successful career and you changing diapers at 3 A.M.  Mutual respect is the key to a good relationship.

Sometimes your relationships will fit gender roles. Sometimes they won’t. What matters more is whether they’re built upon ethics, empathy, and equity.

13. “Yes ma’am” and “yes sir” still go a long way.

Yes, sucking up to people can get you what you want. Just be aware of the possible costs to such compromises. Also, know that being kind to others is often its own reward, and that’s what makes life sweeter.

14. The reason that they’re called “private parts” is because they’re “private”.  Please do not scratch them in public.

Or better yet, know your audience. ;)

15. Peer pressure is a scary thing.  Be a good leader and others will follow. 

Or be a good follower. Or step aside and watch the world go by. But know that you have the power to make the world better for others and for yourself, even if that power seems entirely insignificant.

16. Bringing her flowers for no reason is always a good idea.

An even better idea: bring her to the flowers. Visit your local gardens, and experience that which is thriving in nature. So much of which makes life beautiful can’t be bought.

17. Be patriotic.

Sometimes that means questioning or even opposing actions of your local and national governmental agencies. Remember that governments exist to serve people, and that includes you and me.

18. Potty humor isn’t the only thing that’s humorous.  

But if your only other available option for a laugh is a bad pun, just let that moment pass in silence. ;)

19. Please choose your spouse wisely.  My daughter-in-law will be the gatekeeper for me spending time with you and my grandchildren.

That means choosing someone who has compatible goals to yourself, no matter short term or long term, one partner or several. I trust you to know what’s right for you, so don’t worry your head over whether or not I’ll approve of hir.

20. Remember to call your mother because I might be missing you.

Really, anyone who loves you and cares for you will be glad to hear from you. And hopefully, we’ll be reaching out to you as well.

andythenerd:

“Pro-family.”  People toss that around a lot, especially when they want support from values voters.  But what does that even mean, anyway? 

There’s a group out there masquerading as pro-family while pushing for a constitutional amendment that will end up hurting children.  Read more here.

andythenerd:

God is not great.